Fantasy Formula 1 - Malaysia: The other stuff

Hello, FF1-heads. Time once again for the random discarded front-wing end-plate that is The Other Stuff...

Naughty corner: Surprisingly, that one goes to Das Sebulator, for his ill-tempered slagging off of Karthikeyan post-race. He’s normally such a nice chap too...

Hero: Oh, come on. It couldn’t be anyone other than Perez, now could it? Stunning drive, and I genuinely think he could have got Alonso too. If he’s not in a Ferrari next year, I’ll eat my hat. The marshmallow one. Not the real one. I’m not as stupid as I look.

Fantasy Formula 1 driver of the day was Alonso with a rain-assisted 39!

Mark E retains his lead for a second race, having scored well with a budget team. 10% of the season gone – can he keep it up?

Front to back gap – 532 points! That’s bigger than Coulthard’s jawbone!

Best driver so far in FF1 land is Perez, with Rosberg, Maldonado, Massa, Grosjean and de la Rosa all, literally, pointless.

Top team is Ferrari, with Mercedes dragging their silver bottom along in last place at the moment.

Fantasy Formula 1: Where Seb’s other finger getting an outing was met with a similar reaction from millions of sofas...

Next race: What, there isn’t one this weekend? Dammit! Hang on 3 weeks until China on the 15^th of April, then...

(Choons tonight courtesy of Natasha England's "Back From The Mists Of Time"...)

Comments

Faking it for real

As Donald “I’m really great, everybody says so” Trump is so fond of pointing out, there is a lot of fake news around nowadays. Honest. Your friends at Facebook think so too, and have recently been publishing their top tips for spotting false news – by placing them as ads in newspapers. Considering they came in for considerable criticism themselves, that’s like shouting “Squirrel!” and pointing at a tree whilst you hastily kick away the prize begonias you just trampled. To help you make sense of this (and because I’m a caring person), I thought I’d run you through their suggestions and help to explain them for you. I know. I’m lovely. 1. Be sceptical of headlines READING THIS ARTICLE WILL IMPROVE YOUR SEX LIFE!!! And explain that catchy headlines, or stuff all in capitals might be a bit iffy. 2. Look closely at the URL You can find out more about this at www.wowyouregullible.com if you want to understand how phony web addresses are a sure sign of dodgyness. 3. Investigate...

Going Underground

The US presidential election and Brexit must have made me more nervous than I’d realised. It seems I’ve created an underground bunker without realising I was doing it. Still – we’ve all done that at some point, right? No? Ah... In that case, the fact that I have inadvertently turned my cellar into a rudimentary survival shelter, just in case it all kicks off, demonstrates a severe case of bunker mentality. Fretting about Donald and his wall, and Hillary and her emails, clearly made me more paranoid that I thought about the possibility of WW3 kicking off. Whilst attempting to find a specific size of imperial washer the other day (turns out I’d mis-filed it in the nut cabinet – Tsk!) I was struck by what a lot of jam and chutney we have in the cellar. And I do mean a LOT. There are boxes of boiled-up sugar and fruit and more boxes of boiled up vinegar and fruit. We’re still only part way through 2015’s output too. Then there’s the plastic containers holding pasta in various for...

"It's all gone quiet..." said Roobarb

If, like me, you grew up (and I’m aware of the irony in that) in the ‘70s, February was a tough month, with the sad news that Richard Briers and Bob Godfrey had died. Briers had a distinguished acting career and is, quite rightly, fondly remembered most for his character in ‘The Good Life’. Amongst his many roles, both serious and comedic, he also lent his voice to a startling bit of animation that burst it’s wobbly way on to our wooden-box-surrounded screens in 1974. The 1970s seemed to be largely hued in varying shades of beige, with hints of mustard yellow and burnt orange, and colour TV was a relatively new experience still, so the animated adventures of a daft dog and caustic cat who were the shades of dayglo green and pink normally reserved for highlighter pens, must have been a bit of a shock to the eyes at the time. It caused mine to open very wide indeed. Roobarb was written by Grange Calveley, and brought vividly into life by Godfrey, whose strange, shaky-looking sty...

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