grumpyf1

Careful - I think your ball is boiling... Happy New Year. If you’re still trying to eat the last of the cheese from Christmas and are shocked that Creme Eggs are already in the shops, you have my sympathy. Using my uncanny soothsaying abilities, I’ve peered hard into the mystic tea leaves and rubbed my runes to predict, with startling accuracy, what will happen during the year some are already calling 2018. You’re welcome. January : The mists are blocking my view... looks like, possibly, someone called Eleanor will have a lot of wind early in the month? Brussels sprouts overdose, probably. Hey! It’s not my fault if this is weird – it’s just what’s going to happen, OK? February : Love is in the air! Following a leak from a chemical plant, the fumes released caused numerous fatalities following the... Death. Not love. Sorry. Easy to mix those two up, isn’t it? March : Article 50 is triggered, and we can all finally get on with our lives after a painful and draining lifetime...