grumpyf1

Hello. I’m away on holiday right now – unless you’re a burglar. If so, I’m fetching the baseball bat I keep in the cellar and practising my swing. As I am enjoying some vaguely deserved time off, catching some sun and warmth in the south of Oxfordshire and bits of Hampshire, I’m clearly not able to write a newspaper column this week. (Whoever said “Nothing new there, then” I’m watching you.) Instead, this is the journalistic equivalent of that annoying “Out of Office” message you always seem to get when you email someone about something really urgent. In an effort to ensure the impossibly high standard of quality you have come to expect from me is retained, I’ve tried to cover as many news stories as possible in advance, leaving you with some multiple choice options to drop in to fit whatever has you hurling abuse and the cat at the TV this Friday night. For example, this one should set the scene nicely: What about that insert name here ? Honestly, isn’t it about time th...