grumpyf1

This is my 200th column for this paper. According to a survey I took this week, I’m unlikely to reach 201... Sat at my desk in the office at lunchtime recently, I saw a Tweet from the BBC with a link asking me “How does your lifestyle affect the age of your body?” and a link to an online test to help me discover the age of mine. I know the age of my body. I have a birth certificate to prove it. Still, I’d been out for a brisk 6 mile walk just days before, and was consuming my healthy lunchtime salad, followed by an apple and some fromage frais. So I felt comfortable that I’d get a result suggesting that my body, if not quite a temple, was at least a well-preserved place of interest, and definitely not a condemned building with severe structural problems. Ten minutes of clicking later, I was in for a nasty surprise. It seems the bulldozers of doom will be here to demolish my dangerous abode at any moment. I’ve not even been cluttering up the planet for half a century yet, and ...