grumpyf1

“Set up a distribution list!” they say. “It’ll make life easier”. Good idea – unfortunately, someone at the NHS managed to send an email to 840,000 colleagues… Ever prepare a carefully worded email, hit ‘send’ and then wondered if you included all the people you intended in the ‘To’ field? Never mind – you can always forward in on to anyone missing with an apologetic “Sorry!” at the top and a smiley face to prove you’re a good sort really and it was a genuine mistake. Better than doing it the other way round, and including someone you didn’t mean to. What if it was irrelevant to the recipient? Embarrassing. What if it was highly relevant? “Peter is the single worst employee we have, and his shirts give me a headache. Surely that’s grounds for dismissal?” and you sent it to me… sorry, him? Devastating. (Especially as they’re nice shirts really.) Most of the time, it’s just great entertainment value. You get to see all sorts of interesting stuff when people unintentionally reply ...

When I returned from holiday to work recently, I had 180 emails. I was chuffed, as I was expecting a lot more. In the past, over 300 hasn’t been uncommon for a week away from the office. I’m assuming that, should I ever go away for more than two weeks, hitting four figures is entirely possible. I’ll then need another holiday to recover once I’ve cleared them. A sense of creeping dread always accompanies the last couple of days of precious freedom, with the knowledge of the impending email marathon looming large on the horizon. The fact that everyone you see during your first morning back asks how your break was, and allows you enough time to say “It rained quite a lot, and I caught Ebola...” before jumping in and asking what you’re doing about their email, doesn’t help. Apparently, replying with “I reckon I’ll hit Tuesday before lunch, so if you sent it after that come back tomorrow.” is considered unhelpful, whilst saying “Email? I can’t even remember who you are.” is ‘u...