Skip to main content

Meow! Prancing Horse gets catty


They're only happy when they're whingeing. Ferrari have had a right old grumble on their website about the new teams joining F1 this season (or not, depending on which rumour you listen to).

Try this: "Two teams will limp to the start of the championship, a third is being pushed by an invisible hand and, as for the fourth, you would do well to call Missing Persons to find it. In the meantime, we have lost two constructors along the way, in the shape of BMW and Toyota, while at Renault, there is not much left other than the name. Was it all worth it?”

I think they might be unhappy about something or someone. Can't quite put my finger on who, but they sure are taking it to the Max.

They aren't too keen on Stefan either... “Serbian vultures, who picked the bones of Toyota on its deathbed”.

Ooooooo - back in the knife drawer, Mrs Sharp!

So they're blaming the decision to introduce spending restraints, allowing new teams to enter F1 so that they actually have a vague chance of competing, for the departure of "big" teams? Let's look at the evidence, shall we?

BMW - did pretty well until last year, when they were only slightly better than me in my Punto 1.2 (Probably. I'd have given the Toro Rosso's a run for their money though.)

Toyota: Many years, no wins. Occasionally good, mostly mediocre. More likely to get one of their road cars going really fast when the pedals got stuck.

Ferrari have been in F1 forever. That makes them the F1 equivalent of a great-granny; Sat in the corner grumbling about how things aren't what they used to be, why does everyone look so scruffy these days, who are you anyway? and I was right all along, see?

Maybe it's not time for the retirement home just yet, but perhaps they need to make sure there actually is an F1 for them to win in, rather than trying to scare off everyone by being grumpy.

That's my job.

(Late career oddity - Squeeze's "Babylon And On" from 87. Trust me to open my mouth)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A very modern malady

Hello. I’m Doctor Grenville, and I’m here today to talk to you about SSS – or “Sad Selfie Syndrome”, to give it it’s full medical name. I’m a fully qualified medical doctor thing – I’ve got a PhD from Queens University Academy College Kendal (or “QUACK” for short) to prove it. That means it’s OK for me to talk to you about a very sensitive subject today and stroke your knee. Soothing, no? In my many years of medicinalising practice, I’ve come across some terrible afflictions. I’ve seen Achey Breaky Heart, Kneesles (where you get an itchy rash on your kneecaps) and even a very rare case of the Mercedes Benz. But recently I started seeing shocking images, on social media, graphically showing the devastating results of SSS. If you haven’t heard of it before, you’ve almost certainly seen pictures of what happens to the victims, who are mostly under the age of 30. We’ve already come to understand the irrational, overwhelming need for some amongst this group to photograph everythin...

Faking it for real

As Donald “I’m really great, everybody says so” Trump is so fond of pointing out, there is a lot of fake news around nowadays. Honest. Your friends at Facebook think so too, and have recently been publishing their top tips for spotting false news – by placing them as ads in newspapers. Considering they came in for considerable criticism themselves, that’s like shouting “Squirrel!” and pointing at a tree whilst you hastily kick away the prize begonias you just trampled. To help you make sense of this (and because I’m a caring person), I thought I’d run you through their suggestions and help to explain them for you. I know. I’m lovely. 1. Be sceptical of headlines READING THIS ARTICLE WILL IMPROVE YOUR SEX LIFE!!! And explain that catchy headlines, or stuff all in capitals might be a bit iffy. 2. Look closely at the URL You can find out more about this at www.wowyouregullible.com if you want to understand how phony web addresses are a sure sign of dodgyness. 3. Investigate...

Fantasy Formula 1 - Hungary Results

Sometimes there's a wonderful "huh?" moment in F1. Today's was when the lights didn't go to red at the start, but flashed green and yellow. I'm sure all the drivers are briefed, and everyone knows the drill, but they all just sat there - no-one wanted to be the first to move. In the most high-tech sport in the world, it took Charlie Whiting waving at them to make them go. To be honest, it wasn't the most thrilling of races, but Happy Hamilton "The slow boys won't get out of my way! It's not fair! Boohoohooo - I'm telling Charlie!" winning does mean the front end of the points table still looks deliciously tight. What we really need now, as the excitement level ramps up, is.... to take 5 weeks off. Dammit. Still, to keep you occupied, I want you to memorise the points you all scored today. It's easy to remember mine. I came last... RACE RESULT Position Name Point...