Ding dong silently on high

SHHHHHSHH!

Great news for Cumbrian kampanaphobia sufferers this week.

Barrow’s St James’ the Great Church may be searching for new bell-ringers, but their neighbours won’t be left with a ringing in their ears.

The would-be bong merchants might be tugging away like the clappers, but it will still be a silent night as they practice their bell control, thanks to an eight-bell simulator. This tinnitus-preventing marvel is being funded by the Heritage Lottery Fund.

I have visions of people wearing VR headsets pulling on virtual ropes here, but I’m trying hard not to find that terribly amusing. However it works, it sounds (or not) like a great idea.

With a recruitment drive taking place across the country, 1,400 bell ringers are being sought this year to mark 100 years since World War One ended – 1.400 being the number of bell ringers who died in the conflict. November 11th this year will mark the moment that church bells were rung spontaneously countrywide, celebrating the end of four years of war.

According to St James’ organisers, it offers participants a “moderate workout for both body and mind”.

Perhaps I can suggest some contemporary tunes they could try out: Bjork’s “It’s Oh So Quiet” comes to mind, as does Depeche Mode’s “Enjoy the Silence”.

If the idea of this chimes with you, or strikes you as something fun and you fancy ringing the changes, you know what to do - Give them a bell.

This post first appeared as the second piece in my column/page in The Mail and the News & Star, on the 2nd of March 2018.

I do like chucking in lots of punning references, don't I? Ding dong!

(CD A-Z: Within Temptation's "Enter".)

Comments

Malaysian Grand Prix - Vettel hot, but not bothered

Malaysia. It's always hot, and it always rains. Except the 2nd part is no longer true (unless you count the drizzly bit around lap 14). Saturday's qualifying session had highlighted the fact that Red Bull and McLaren seemed well matched on pace, but also that Ferrari were struggling. Whilst Vettel bagged another pole, followed by Hamilton, Webber and Button, Alonso was only 5th, and Massa 7th, with Nick Heidfeld an excellent 6th on the grid between the two red cars. At this point, I would like to break momentarily for a small rant: How many times do I have to say Heidfeld is good? Why wasn't he given a top drive years ago? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! ARE YOU BLIND!!!?? Ahem. The Hispanias somehow managed to a) turn up b) remember to bring cars c) get both of them on the track d) actually get both of them within 107%. Pretty remarkable really. Oh, and it didn't rain. Race day looked a more likely candidate for a drop of the wet stuff. The start was exciting, with...

A fisful of change at the shops

A recent day out reminded me how much the retail experience has altered during my lifetime – and it’s not all good. I could stop typing this, and buy a fridge, in a matter of seconds. The shops are shut and it’s 9pm, but I could still place the order and arrange delivery. I haven’t got to wander round a white-goods retail emporium trying to work out which slightly different version of something that keeps my cider cold is better. It’ll be cheaper, too. But in amongst the convenience, endless choice and bargains, we’ve lost some of the personal, human, touches that used to make a trip to the shops something more than just a daily chore. Last weekend, we visited a local coastal town. Amongst the shops selling over-priced imported home accessories (who doesn’t need another roughly-hewn wooden heart, poorly painted and a bargain at £10?) was one that looked different. It’s window allowed you to see in, rather than being plastered with stick-on graphics and special offers calling ...

Suffering from natural obsolescence

You know you’re getting old when it dawns on you that you’re outliving technological breakthroughs. You know the sort of thing – something revolutionary, that heralds a seismic shift it the way the modern world operates. Clever, time-saving, breathtaking and life-changing (and featuring a circuit board). It’s the future, baby! Until it isn’t any more. I got to pondering this when we laughed heartily in the office about someone asking if our camcorder used “tape”. Tape? Get with the times, Daddy-o! If it ain’t digital then for-get-it! I then attempted to explain to an impossibly young colleague that video tape in a camcorder was indeed once a “thing”, requiring the carrying of something the size of a briefcase around on your shoulder, containing batteries normally reserved for a bus, and a start-up time from pressing ‘Record’ so lengthy, couples were already getting divorced by the time it was ready to record them saying “I do”. After explaining what tape was, I realised I’d ...

grumpyf1

Search This Blog