Fantasy Formula 1: Belgium - the other stuff

... and in F1 2022 news, Pastor Maldonado has defied critics, winning his 8th World Championship for the McLaren-Ferrari team, at the Syrian Grand Prix.

In a shocking incident, Michael Schumacher (who has still failed to win another race since his comeback more than a decade ago) slightly scratched his finger after crashing his car, head on, into a wall at 300mph, before cartwheeling 12 times, catching fire, exploding, landing in a razor-blade factory, being struck by lightning, eating some very old cheese he found in the back of the fridge, walking under a ladder, kicking a black cat, putting his new shoes on a table, opening an umbrella indoors and calling Arnold Schwarzenegger 'a big girl'.

Critics and fans alike are saying that 'somebody' or 'something' should do 'some stuff' urgently about safety, to avoid anything dangerous ever happening to anyone, anywhere, at any time, ever again. Ever. Some have said this is unnecessary overreaction, but they were turned upon by the baying crowd (who, it seems, are clearly unaware of the word 'irony'), and haven't been seen since.

Now here's Sally with the interstellar weather forecast....

Naughty corner: I could jump on the bandwagon and say Grosjean, but I’m sticking with my “Maldonad’oh for President Of The Idiots” stance. He’s a penalty magnet, much more so that Romain.

Hero: Jenson. Obvious, really, wasn’t it?

Fantasy Formula 1 driver of the day was (are you sitting down?!) Massa, with 28 points.

Mark E makes it 12 races out front, but his margin has been cut to just 7 points. Domination over?

If you wanted to move up from last to first, you’d now only need 370 points. And everyone else to not score anything until you caught up. Should be fine, then.

In Fantasy F1 land (where it’s always sunny, and Pastor’s been banned for the next 3 seasons) Alonso leads, but with a reduced lead over Raikkonen, whilst de la Rosa scores points again, but is still last. Ferrari swap places at the front with Lotus (thanks to Felipe) and HRT are even more last than they were before. If that’s possible. I was never very good with numbers.

Apparently that Jermode D’Ambrosio out of F1 2011 will be filling Grosjean’s clumsy shoes next time out, so I’m hoping to resurrect some of my custard and creamed rice jokes. Happy days.

And when is the next race? Why, it’s this very weekend! The Italian GP is on the 9th of September, as we attempt to cram 8 races into 12 weeks. Nice.

(Tunes to accompany tonight's madness were from Paul McCartney's "Run Devil Run" album.)

Malaysian Grand Prix - Vettel hot, but not bothered

Malaysia. It's always hot, and it always rains. Except the 2nd part is no longer true (unless you count the drizzly bit around lap 14). Saturday's qualifying session had highlighted the fact that Red Bull and McLaren seemed well matched on pace, but also that Ferrari were struggling. Whilst Vettel bagged another pole, followed by Hamilton, Webber and Button, Alonso was only 5th, and Massa 7th, with Nick Heidfeld an excellent 6th on the grid between the two red cars. At this point, I would like to break momentarily for a small rant: How many times do I have to say Heidfeld is good? Why wasn't he given a top drive years ago? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! ARE YOU BLIND!!!?? Ahem. The Hispanias somehow managed to a) turn up b) remember to bring cars c) get both of them on the track d) actually get both of them within 107%. Pretty remarkable really. Oh, and it didn't rain. Race day looked a more likely candidate for a drop of the wet stuff. The start was exciting, with

I know I'll regret this...

For @Feisty_Onion @BroughtonLass @LizWestmorland Me... before the grumpiness set in. Have a great weekend.

Senna bags Willy drive?

The great thing about F1 rumours is that they change every 5 minutes. Just last week it was looking like Barrichello might be back in at Williams, as new engines, tech staff and a general reshuffle would mean they needed someone who actually knew what they were doing in an F1 car. Which rules out Maldonado, obviously. Now it looks like Senna might be about to get a seat with the team where his Uncle lost his life. I'm sure Bruno's mum must be delighted. I don't hold with all this superstitious mumbo-jumbo though, and with the extraordinary level of safety in modern F1 cars, Bruno should be pretty safe. There is one significant problem with Williams signing him though - and this is going to be a bit unpopular I suspect - Bruno isn't very good. Yes, he put in a couple of reasonable performances with Renault, but Nick Heidfeld (ah... Nick and his lovely beard...) would have been able to do likewise, has he not been dropped. And then they dropped Senna too. Thi

grumpyf1

Search This Blog