Fantasy Formula 1: Japan - the other stuff

Welcome, my friends, to the show that NEVER ends!

Except when you reach the bottom of the page. Then it stops big time. Life's a bitch, no?

Whilst Lewis is busy taking the 'social' out of 'social media' and the 'mate' out of 'team-mate' on twitter, let us consider instead the random sweepings from Fantasy Formula 1 after the Japanese GP...

Naughty corner: He bags a drive with a top team, shows up the guy he’s going to be replacing, then promptly says hello to some gravel in a fumbled attempt to overtake. Hello, Sergio.Naughty corner: He bags a drive with a top team, shows up the guy he’s going to be replacing, then promptly says hello to some gravel in a fumbled attempt to overtake. Hello, Sergio.

Hero: Having bagged a drive with a top team, he proceeds to show up the guy he’s going to be replacing in a stunningly well timed lunge down the inside. Hello, Sergio. Please see the paragraph above...

Fantasy Formula 1 driver of the day was (sharp intake of breath)... Massa! With 34 points! No-one picked him this year! *facepalm*

Mark E in shock ‘no longer at the front’ shock! Shocking! Yes, FF1 veteran Elmon (in his 13th season) has bagged the top spot, with 5 races remaining. Can Mark claw it back? Or will the big spenders finally come good at the end? Ooo – it’s just like the real thing. But without the glamour, fame and money.

393 points now exists between first and last. Let’s be realistic here – it’s not looking good for the win, is it?

Whilst Alonso somehow clings on to the top score in FF1, his team mate, Massa, gatecrashes the top 10 at number 9. Karthinkeyan is still really quite last. Ferrari are still the highest scoring team, but McLaren have now leapt up to 2nd. HRT are resolutely last.

And still Olie B moves up the order! For the 10th race in a row he’s ascended, and has now made the top 10, 125 points off the lead. Too late..?

In FF1 world, all the teams scored again this race.

Next race: It’s Korean GP time! This very weekend, on the 14th of October, at stupidly-early-o’clock! See you on the sofa – it’s your turn to make the coffee, and for God’s sake, put some pants on this time if you’re coming in your dressing gown.

(Alanis is still grumbling away...)

Comments

Making an exhibition of yourself

Now and again, it’s good to reaffirm that you’re a (relatively) normal human being. One excellent way of doing this is to go to a business exhibition. Despite what you might have surmised from reading my previous columns, I am employable, and even capable of acting like a regular person most of the time, even joining in the Monday morning conversation about the weather over the weekend, and why (insert name of footyballs manager here) should be fired immediately. The mug! True, there are times, often involving a caffeine deficiency, where it is like having the distilled essence of ten moody teenagers in the room, but I try and get that out of the way when people I genuinely like aren’t around to see it. As part of my ongoing experiment with what others call ‘working’, my ‘job’ involves me occasionally needing to go and see what some of my colleagues get up to outside the office, and what our competitors do to try and make sure that they do whatever my colleagues do better than ...

"It's all gone quiet..." said Roobarb

If, like me, you grew up (and I’m aware of the irony in that) in the ‘70s, February was a tough month, with the sad news that Richard Briers and Bob Godfrey had died. Briers had a distinguished acting career and is, quite rightly, fondly remembered most for his character in ‘The Good Life’. Amongst his many roles, both serious and comedic, he also lent his voice to a startling bit of animation that burst it’s wobbly way on to our wooden-box-surrounded screens in 1974. The 1970s seemed to be largely hued in varying shades of beige, with hints of mustard yellow and burnt orange, and colour TV was a relatively new experience still, so the animated adventures of a daft dog and caustic cat who were the shades of dayglo green and pink normally reserved for highlighter pens, must have been a bit of a shock to the eyes at the time. It caused mine to open very wide indeed. Roobarb was written by Grange Calveley, and brought vividly into life by Godfrey, whose strange, shaky-looking sty...

Suffering from natural obsolescence

You know you’re getting old when it dawns on you that you’re outliving technological breakthroughs. You know the sort of thing – something revolutionary, that heralds a seismic shift it the way the modern world operates. Clever, time-saving, breathtaking and life-changing (and featuring a circuit board). It’s the future, baby! Until it isn’t any more. I got to pondering this when we laughed heartily in the office about someone asking if our camcorder used “tape”. Tape? Get with the times, Daddy-o! If it ain’t digital then for-get-it! I then attempted to explain to an impossibly young colleague that video tape in a camcorder was indeed once a “thing”, requiring the carrying of something the size of a briefcase around on your shoulder, containing batteries normally reserved for a bus, and a start-up time from pressing ‘Record’ so lengthy, couples were already getting divorced by the time it was ready to record them saying “I do”. After explaining what tape was, I realised I’d ...

grumpyf1

Search This Blog