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German GP - Alonso reigns, Hamilton complains


Still smiling from his win in Britain, Mark Webber kept the grin factor high between races by re-signing for Red Bull for another year.

It turned out to be a good time to do it, as Germany was about to be a duff weekend for him.

Q1 was damp, and nearly saw home hero Schumacher taking an early bus back to the hotel, as he just managed to squeak through to the second round.

Q2 did a good impression of recreating an English Summer, the only surprises being how consistently rubbish Massa and Senna can be.

The final session really needed something with more tread than even the wet weather rubber provided, but even tractor tyres would have struggled to cope with the standing water, as a lucky Hulkenberg discovered, surviving a full tilt spin without hitting anything. Alonso proved again his mastery of all conditions to bag pole, but with Webber dropping 5 places for a gearbox change, Vettel and Schumacher were the nearest to him, with super-spinner Hulkenberg a startled 4th, Maldond’oh 5th and a dejected Button and Hamilton 6th and 7th.

Red Bull had to defend themselves against accusations of shonky engine mapping overnight after the FIA reported them to the stewards, but it all seemed to have blown over by Sunday, much like exhaust fumes over a diffuser. Which was what the fuss was all about in the first place.

The top 4 got away in order as the dry race began, whilst Massa booked his place in the doldrums early, swiping his front wing off in a bodged swoop past a Toro Rosso.

Inter-German rivalry kicked off big time as Das Schumi and Herr Pointyfinger battled it out early on, and by the first time round, 3 cars were heading into the pits with less than they started off with; Grosjean and Massa for new noses, and Senna with a puncture.

Happy Hamilton had one too, but had to go nearly a full lap, trundling into the pits dead last and with his top defeatist head on already, telling the team “That’s it guys – we should retire”. Although the reply wasn’t transmitted, it must have been something along the lines of “Thanks, sunshine – we’ll bloody decide that. Get back out there, stop complaining, and overtake someone!”

By lap 5, Alonso and Vettel were edging away from Schumacher, and Kimi and di Resta engaged in a thrilling bit of wheel to wheel scrapping through a series of corners. A few laps later, and an on-form Button dummied Hulkenberg nicely, bagging 4th place.

Perez was flying once again, up from 17th to 9th by lap 9, and Jenson’s weekend continued to improve a couple of laps later, as he nipped past Michael for 3rd place.

The Hulk was heading in the opposite direction, losing places to Schumi and Kimi in the space of two corners on lap 18. Alonso pitted from the lead a lap later, and Seb piled in after another tour, but positions remained the same.

A third of the way through the race, the Saubers were showing fine form, with Perez 7th and Kobayashi 9th, albeit on different strategies. Up front, things were getting tense as Vettel moved into DRS range of Alonso, and a few laps later, Button started catching Seb too.

Hamilton, having complained to the team that there was something wrong with his car (the irony being it was probably him), still managed to catch, and then unlap himself, past Vettel, who waved angrily at Lewis, and later muttered about “respect” in a speech so similar to Senna’s about Irivine, it made you wonder if he’d got it on repeat on YouTube.

Crunch time commenced on lap 41, as JB headed into the pits. Alonso and Vettel did the same the following lap, but fresh tyres, and a record-breaking pitstop by McLaren of just 2.3 seconds, allowed Jenson to get out just ahead of Seb into 2nd place.

Jenson closed on Alonso over the following laps, and by lap 49 was in DRS range of the owner of the big eyebrows, but unable to edge close enough for a pass.

Seb was busy, with 10 laps left, trying out bits of the circuit outside of the white lines – in hindsight, it could be suggested he was doing it on purpose to check out the grip levels...

Meanwhile, Hamilton parked up in the garage and headed off for a good sulk and some high-grade pouting. Called in, or gave up? Happy 100th race, Lewis.

With 6 laps left, Jenson’s tyres were suffering from the punishment of scrabbling to get a grip behind Alonso, and he began to slip back into Seb’s clutches.

Into the last 4 laps, the top 3 were covered by a deliciously small 3 seconds, and a couple of laps later Seb scrabbled past Jenson – but using a run-off area.

Alonso claimed another great victory, and for the first time it looks like we have someone actually trying to grab hold of the title with half the season gone. And whilst Seb enjoyed the champers on the podium, the stewards were plotting his demise, handing him a 20 second penalty later, dropping him to 5th, and promoting Raikkonen to 3rd – another tidy result for the Finn, having started 10th. On the plus side, that did mean Kimi didn’t get interviewed on the podium...

(The really rather splendid Amy MacDonald is residing in the CD player tonight, specifically her "A Curious Thing" album from 2010.)

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I know I'll regret this...

For @Feisty_Onion @BroughtonLass @LizWestmorland Me... before the grumpiness set in. Have a great weekend.