Bit of Willy/Sickly Schumi/New Ferrari/Hulky the 3rd

As none of these stories seemed to warrant a full article (and frankly I'm just plain lazy), here's a news round-up from the last few days, Jenwis-style....

BIT OF WILLY

The Williams team are considering selling shares, but not to raise funds. Eh? Seriously though - who wouldn't want to own a share in one of the most highly respected F1 teams ever? How much, Frank...?

SICKLY SCHUMI

It's fair to say that his questionable ethics have sometime made viewers pretty sick, not to mention Rubens. But apparently, the Schu-meister gets all giddy and poorly when driving an F1 simulator. Slight drawback that. although apparently it's not a problem at all. Of course not. Take some travel sickness pills (those funny tasting pink ones) and get on with it, Michael.

NEW FERRARI

They didn't manage to come first in anything last year, but by way of consolation, Ferrari will be the first team to launch their new car this season... TOMORROW! Stand by for me to be over-excitable again....

HULKY THE 3RD

With Paul di Resta confirmed at Force India, the Incredible Hulkenberg has has to settle into the role of test driver at the same team, although FI's positive policy of actually letting the 3rd driver get in the car on Fridays now and again should keep him in touch. He'll be hoping di Resta or Sutil have a poor season....

(Resolutely uncool tonight, but I really don't give a damn - listening to Billy Joel's "The Ultimate Collection".)

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Malaysian Grand Prix - Vettel hot, but not bothered

Malaysia. It's always hot, and it always rains. Except the 2nd part is no longer true (unless you count the drizzly bit around lap 14). Saturday's qualifying session had highlighted the fact that Red Bull and McLaren seemed well matched on pace, but also that Ferrari were struggling. Whilst Vettel bagged another pole, followed by Hamilton, Webber and Button, Alonso was only 5th, and Massa 7th, with Nick Heidfeld an excellent 6th on the grid between the two red cars. At this point, I would like to break momentarily for a small rant: How many times do I have to say Heidfeld is good? Why wasn't he given a top drive years ago? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! ARE YOU BLIND!!!?? Ahem. The Hispanias somehow managed to a) turn up b) remember to bring cars c) get both of them on the track d) actually get both of them within 107%. Pretty remarkable really. Oh, and it didn't rain. Race day looked a more likely candidate for a drop of the wet stuff. The start was exciting, with...

A fisful of change at the shops

A recent day out reminded me how much the retail experience has altered during my lifetime – and it’s not all good. I could stop typing this, and buy a fridge, in a matter of seconds. The shops are shut and it’s 9pm, but I could still place the order and arrange delivery. I haven’t got to wander round a white-goods retail emporium trying to work out which slightly different version of something that keeps my cider cold is better. It’ll be cheaper, too. But in amongst the convenience, endless choice and bargains, we’ve lost some of the personal, human, touches that used to make a trip to the shops something more than just a daily chore. Last weekend, we visited a local coastal town. Amongst the shops selling over-priced imported home accessories (who doesn’t need another roughly-hewn wooden heart, poorly painted and a bargain at £10?) was one that looked different. It’s window allowed you to see in, rather than being plastered with stick-on graphics and special offers calling ...

Suffering from natural obsolescence

You know you’re getting old when it dawns on you that you’re outliving technological breakthroughs. You know the sort of thing – something revolutionary, that heralds a seismic shift it the way the modern world operates. Clever, time-saving, breathtaking and life-changing (and featuring a circuit board). It’s the future, baby! Until it isn’t any more. I got to pondering this when we laughed heartily in the office about someone asking if our camcorder used “tape”. Tape? Get with the times, Daddy-o! If it ain’t digital then for-get-it! I then attempted to explain to an impossibly young colleague that video tape in a camcorder was indeed once a “thing”, requiring the carrying of something the size of a briefcase around on your shoulder, containing batteries normally reserved for a bus, and a start-up time from pressing ‘Record’ so lengthy, couples were already getting divorced by the time it was ready to record them saying “I do”. After explaining what tape was, I realised I’d ...

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