Customer 'service'...

Hello again.
Guess what?! It's been 15 days, and Tesco haven't replied. Time for a follow-up email...

Dear Tesco Customer Services,

Hello again! Thanks for your lovely reply to my original email. It was nice of you to reply instantly with a message saying you would be in touch shortly. The cheery ‘Kind regards Tesco’ at the end was a nice touch.

Can I be awkward and point a little thing out to you though? Whilst I’m sure the actual length of the word ‘shortly’ can be interpreted in myriad ways (for instance, shortly in galactic terms could possibly be several thousand millennia, give or take a few, whilst someone whose underpants were on fire might be rightly hoping that ‘shortly’, when uttered by the 999 person on the other end of the phone, will be very, very, VERY quick indeed.), 15 days without a response does seem to be a touch towards the lengthy end of the ‘Shortly Spectrum’. I did just invent that, yes.

Maybe the hideously complicated and convoluted story of confusion and chaos has taken this long to unravel and, after an in depth investigation, some high-level bottom-kicking and a general period of thoughtful reflection, you’re just in the process of resolving my problem, and were just this second typing a reply. Or maybe I’m just number 27400987 on the list that a team of three (one of whom is on maternity leave and a second off sick) are trying to get through.

Now, in global terms, my request was pretty teensy. What’s a paltry 650 clubcard points, when there are riots on the streets? Unless, of course, all the journalists and politicians have seriously missed the point and the rioters were actually attempting to get themselves a little looted joy, to try and bolster their inner sadness having also failed to get their clubcard points. Hmmmmm. Not very likely, I agree.

By way of trying to make myself move up the list a little, I do get all my shopping from Tesco (legally – I haven’t looted it, honestly) and have done for a long time. I’m what you might call a loyal customer. Does that count for anything at all..?

Anyway, chin up – I’m sure you’ll clear the huge backlog of complaints and queries eventually. When mine reaches the top, could you possibly get back to me?

Ta very much.

Kind regards,

grumpyf1

(Typed to the tune of Status Quo's "The Anniversary Waltz".)

Malaysian Grand Prix - Vettel hot, but not bothered

Malaysia. It's always hot, and it always rains. Except the 2nd part is no longer true (unless you count the drizzly bit around lap 14). Saturday's qualifying session had highlighted the fact that Red Bull and McLaren seemed well matched on pace, but also that Ferrari were struggling. Whilst Vettel bagged another pole, followed by Hamilton, Webber and Button, Alonso was only 5th, and Massa 7th, with Nick Heidfeld an excellent 6th on the grid between the two red cars. At this point, I would like to break momentarily for a small rant: How many times do I have to say Heidfeld is good? Why wasn't he given a top drive years ago? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! ARE YOU BLIND!!!?? Ahem. The Hispanias somehow managed to a) turn up b) remember to bring cars c) get both of them on the track d) actually get both of them within 107%. Pretty remarkable really. Oh, and it didn't rain. Race day looked a more likely candidate for a drop of the wet stuff. The start was exciting, with

I know I'll regret this...

For @Feisty_Onion @BroughtonLass @LizWestmorland Me... before the grumpiness set in. Have a great weekend.

Senna bags Willy drive?

The great thing about F1 rumours is that they change every 5 minutes. Just last week it was looking like Barrichello might be back in at Williams, as new engines, tech staff and a general reshuffle would mean they needed someone who actually knew what they were doing in an F1 car. Which rules out Maldonado, obviously. Now it looks like Senna might be about to get a seat with the team where his Uncle lost his life. I'm sure Bruno's mum must be delighted. I don't hold with all this superstitious mumbo-jumbo though, and with the extraordinary level of safety in modern F1 cars, Bruno should be pretty safe. There is one significant problem with Williams signing him though - and this is going to be a bit unpopular I suspect - Bruno isn't very good. Yes, he put in a couple of reasonable performances with Renault, but Nick Heidfeld (ah... Nick and his lovely beard...) would have been able to do likewise, has he not been dropped. And then they dropped Senna too. Thi

grumpyf1

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