Spa is chuffing marvelous, isn't it?
Brilliant circuit, weather we British types can identify with, and a pretty-much-guaranteed shunt during an exciting race. 2011's outing didn't disappoint, even with a lack of precipitation on race day.
After the delights of 4 weeks with no F1 (during which some of us got a taste of what it'll be like next year if you don't have Sky), Nick Heidfeld found himself drive-free after being replaced by Bruno Senna at Renault. Odd decision - pretty likely haul of points from Nick, or a few million quid from Bruno... oh, hang on. I just answered my own question - with rumours circulating that Renault (who, as you'd expect in the crazy world of F1 have pretty much naff all to do with Renault) are a touch on the skint side, accepting some wonga may be their only route out of trouble - although points quite literally mean (cash) prizes at the end of the season.
Still, Nick has decided to sue the team to get his drive back, which is a water-tight plan for getting reinstated, isn't it...
Schumi was celebrating the 20th anniversary of blagging a seat at Jordan (by fibbing to EJ about knowing his way around Spa), but unfortunately his porkies came back to bite him on the bot when one of his wheels went AWOL before he'd even done a lap in quali. Happy anniversary Michael - you worst qualifying position ever.
Sutil binned it in Q2 bringing out the red flag, and Button had one of those awkward ' We're a multi-million pound team with robust procedures and loads of technology so we should be able to get a simple message over about when to slow down' communication failures that saw him out , P13 on the grid and long of face.
Alguersuarus and Senna did well to get in to the top 10, whilst Hamilton and Skeletor (sorry, Maldonado) had a scrap for one of the corners before acting like sulky 5 year-olds afterwards and colliding. Pastor got a 5 place penalty, Lewis got yet another reprimand to add to his ever-expanding collection.
Race day saw Red Bull worried about the state of their tyres, in a somewhat farcical situation that, simply put, may have sounded a bit like this:
Pirelli: Don't do that to the tyres, you'll knacker them...
Red Bull: Ha! We'll do what we like pal - we're Red Bull!
Pirelli: Seriously, do that and you'll bugger them up big time.
Red Bull: We'll do what we want and.... Oh.
Pirelli: What is it?
Red Bull: We've knackered our tyres.
Pirelli: Ha ha!
Red Bull: Can we have some new ones now? These look a bit dangerous.
Pirelli (with a smug grin): Nope.
FIA (who'd been hiding behind a pile of tyres, smoking a fag): No way.
As the race started, Senna undid all his good work by piling into Alguerserious after failing to realise his car was heavier with full tanks, and he probably needed to brake a bit earlier. The resulting chaos saw various cars spinning and damaged and Button having a wing mirror lopped off by bits of flying Renault. Webber had bogged down (again) and Rosberg nipped brilliantly into 2nd, before sensationally clearing Vettel for the lead.
Seb snatched the place back, but pitted on L6 for new tyres (much to the relief of Adrian Newey, it turned out later).
Senna and Glock got drive-through penalties for being a bit over-exuberant at the start, whilst Rosberg said goodbye to the lead again as Alonso nailed him on lap 7. When he pitted two laps later, Hamilton led for a couple before he too pitted - and Seb was at the front once again.
On lap 13, Hamilton passed Kobayashi without realising that it was THAT Kobayashi (you know - the one who doesn't give up places without a fight) and then moved across the track to head into the corner, failing to spot that Kamui had lobbed his Sauber down the outside. Lewis crashed out yet again, and surprisingly admitted post-race that it had been 100% his fault.
Just about everyone dived into the pits as the Safety Car headed out, with Alonso gaining the lead. Once the race re-started Vettel bagged Webber for P2, whilst Button brilliantly picked off Perez and Petrov in the same move moments later. A Flying Seb then took Alonso for the lead.
Jenson was on a roll though, and continued his climb back through the field after a front wing replacement at his first stop to take Schumacher and Sutil on L23, Massa on L25 and Rosberg on L26.
Whilst JB continued his overtaking masterclass, Alonso and Vettel headed in to get harder tyres for the final stint - something Jenson had already got out of the way at the start. When Webber stopped for the same, Button led briefly before a speedy Vettel, with the benefit of new rubber, regained the lead.
Jenson stopped for soft tyres with 11 laps remaining, and with the lap count dwindling rapidly, Webber and Button were closing on Alonso in 2nd. Mark got him on L37, whilst the Merc boys battled over 5th place.
With two laps to go, Jenson roared past Fernando and Schumacher passed Rosberg for 5th.
Out front, Seb was warming up his pointy finger and bagged another win, with his team-mate second and Button third, proving he can overtake without the aid of moisture.
If the championship wasn't already Seb's, it looks all but definite now.
(Keyboard finger frenzy to the tune of Streetband (featuring Paul Young) and a little bit of 'Toast')
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