Dear Bernie...

Dear Bernie,

Hello. Hope you don't mind me dropping you a letter. I know you're busy trying to cram more cash into your bank account, but I need to say a few things....

A long time ago, in a living room far, far away (well, Oxfordshire, actually) and young me had some pals round for a birthday party. The jelly and ice cream was great, but we'd popped the TV on for a bit of light relief from a Monopoly marathon and there was this F1 thing on. Some chap called James Shunt (or something) went round another car is such spectacular style that I may have said a rude word out loud. My Mum wasn't best pleased, but my love of Formula 1 had begun.

Now, a lot has changed since then. Drivers, teams and even lives have come and gone, and you've rather brilliantly built F1 up into the amazing, globe-striding extravaganza we petrolheads love so much. Emotional investment occurred, big time. We're even going to India this year. Genius work, that. And we're heading back to the USA too (assuming they don't run out of cash in the next couple of days - maybe you could sub that nice Mr O'Bamaladingdong a fiver...?).

There have been a few worrying times for those of us without the cash flow to go to the races, of course. When the BBC lost the coverage to ITV, we not only had the horror of adverts during the race, but James Allen as well. So when it went back to good old Aunty Beeb recently, I (like millions of others) was immensely chuffed. Having finally binned-off that Ledgard chappie and replaced him with the square-of-jaw ex McLaren & Red Bull peddler, the coverage and commentary has been quite excellent.

So I was somewhat flabbergasted this very morning to turn on the twitter and discover that the BBC will only be showing half the races next year, and the Murdoch empire would like me to furnish them with some cash to see all of them. Quite a lot of cash, in fact. As mentioned earlier, I (and many others) don't have the readies to do this and, even though they put an interesting (if hopelessly transparent) positive spin on things, the BBC was our access to F1. Listening to it on the radio isn't quite the same. And have you ever tried to avoid hearing the result until the highlights are on? Some of us have to get up early for work too, y'know.

But I don't blame the BBC. I'm quite fond of them, actually. You know - Doctor Who, Swap Shop and all that. Anyhoo, it's not their fault. They've been told to cut some cash, and F1 does cost rather a lot, doesn't it Bernard? Yes, it does. Mind you, when I'm watching Jake Humphrey trying to get me excited about the ladies horse dressage at the Olympics next year, I might not feel quite so charitable.

And the Sky thing? Well, the timing isn't great, is it? What with the whole flirting with Bahrain when it was flippin' obvious F1 should avoid it with the aid of a particularly long carbon fibre barge pole thing, F1's reputation as not giving a monkeys wasn't great, but hopping into bed with another ancient multi-billionaire right after his chums have listened to everyone's phone calls (including some dead ones) is frankly pretty bloody despicable. But anyway - you can't blame them for taking on F1 - if the BBC can't afford it and no-one else wants it, then hey. Fair game.

But here's the awkward bit; This is about purely about cash, isn't it? Very large quantities of the stuff, I expect. If you were serious about wanting it to stay on a free-to-air channel so that as many people as possible get to see it, then you'd have done a bargain deal with Aunty. Because, let's face it, you definitely won't get everyone switching to Sky. Oh, and I own a 100 year old house - I don't want a sodding dustbin lid nail-gunned to the wall outside. Even if I could afford one. Which I can't. Have I mentioned that? Yes? Well, it's worth repeating.

Here's the tricky part then: If F1 has less viewers, surely that means less publicity for the sponsors (after all, it is quite hard to spot a Red Bull logo on the radio)? That probably means less sponsors after a while. So less cash for the teams. Who may drop out. Especially the manufacturer ones who are in it for the publicity. Less teams, less sponsor cash... sounds like a slippery slope to me.

But hey, what do I know? I just want to watch it on the box. Oh, hang on... I'll only be able to do that 50% of the time, won't I? You clearly know best, and this is a deal that once again helps the teams and keeps the fans hap.... Ah. Bugger.

How's the bank account - nice and fat? Have you considered retirement?

Your disgruntledly,

Grumpyf1 (and several million of my chums, too.)