grumpyf1

Right then. It would appear my cellar is haunted by a ghost that steals nails. Pretty niche I know, but that's what I'm contending with. That and the fact that, 38 years ago, someone used the Daily Mirror as insulation. Yes. My life is strange, isn't it? Thanks for pointing that out. Anyway, here's the driver and team stats following the Singapore GP at the weekend... Naughty corner: Getting that vote yet again this season (its the only thing he's winning) is Lewis Hamilton. Another clumsy, desperate move on Massa. The only good thing about this is that the earstudded one has stopped complaining that he's being victimised by the stewards. Does this mean he's realised he's driving like a prat? Almost certainly not, no. Hero: On the other side of the McLaren garage, Button quietly got on with it and once again put in a no-dramas quality race to 2nd place. Who's best McLaren driver this season? (Clue: Not Lewis.) Fantasy Formula 1 driver of...

Gotta love the Singapore GP. I have what I describe as a ‘vintage’ TV. Its fair to say that others call it ‘old, crappy and it doesn’t even have telextext’, but the Singapore race even looks good on my old Sony box (although widescreen means big black areas at the top and bottom, so I have to go in-between, or I can’t read the positions). And, as a special treat this year, Seb had a sparkly helmet! There is something about a night race though – it just seems that extra bit magical. Petrov probably didn’t find much magical in qualifying though – a slightly-faster lap by his new team-mate Senna saw him drop out in Q1. Kobayashi went flying in Q2, bringing out the red flag whilst bits of Sauber were scraped off the sky, and Hamilton sent out an early warning for a stormy race ahead, by failing to get out in time for a final run and copping a puncture. Yet again, the rain failed to arrive on race day (I won’t be doing that naked rain dance in the street again) and as the red l...

I was starting to think Massa couldn't pull off any dramatic moves, startle another driver by suddenly pouncing or frighten the hell out of one of his competitors by coming out of nowhere. Then he make Hamilton look like a berk by smacking him on the back, telling him what a 'great job' he'd done and giving him the most damning of all hand gestures - a thumbs up with a sarcy grin. Lewis managed a rather feeble "don't touch me, man" in return. Advantage to the titchy Brazilian. Brilliant. Anyway, you're here for the FF1 scores, unless I'm very much mistaken. Here you go then! And now, the running totals. As you can see, Henry is Seb-like in his dominance, whilst I'm doing a Schumi and crashing out big-time. Ah well - another year without the title for me then. (Memo to self - rig the rules next time, idiot.) (I'm listening to all my CD's in alphabetical order. As I own quite a lot of them, the fact that I'm only up to ...

Well, hello. Jolly nice of you to drop by. Pull up a chair, pour yourself a stiff one and join me, your miserable host, for some random FF1 stuff to do with the really rather splendid Italian GP. First up, here's the driver and team statistics! Woo! Yeah! Naughty corner: I would say "stand up Tonio Liuzzi", but he'd probably get that wrong, fall over and knock several innocent upright people onto the floor too... Hero: JB was outstanding once again. Whilst Lewis spent most of the race trying to pass Schumi, Jenson bided his time then nailed both of them. Star. Fantasy Formula 1 driver of the day was the Aluersaurus, with a fab 28 points. The top three drivers so far are Vettel on 295, Button (up 1) with 213 and Alonso (up 1) on 208. Webber drops out of the top 3. Whilst everyone pats Bruno Senna on the back, let us forget not little Nick Heidfeld, who is still the 7th best FF1 driver! The top three teams so far are Red Bull on 299, McLaren with 290 and ...

Ah, Monza. Another of the old-school circuits, where the lack of huge pit buildings, shiny surfaces everywhere and buckets of cash means it's all about the racing. And a flippin' good one it was too - if you ignore Seb. One Italian got of to a flier for his home race at least, as Trulli somewhat surprisingly got re-signed by Lotus. I though he was bound to get dropped at the end of the year, but hey. Seems that, now he's figured out how the steering works, the team are happy with him again. Toasty conditions and long straights with minimal breaking zones tends to muddle things up a bit at Monza, but that wasn't really reflected after quali, with pointyfinger half a second ahead of everyone, chased forlornly by Hamilton (new policy - don't criticize anything), Button (wear ridiculously big shades at every opportunity), Alonso (smile a lot - hope for the best), Webber (I could have been a contender) and Massa (yes, I am still driving a Ferrari. Over here! Hello...

For a second, just pretend Seb doesn't exist, OK? We had a stunning race, Button won again with Alonso pleasing the Tifosi with a close 2nd place, Hamilton made the podium and everyone was happy. Well... maybe not Webber. Or anyone who happened to unfortunately be in the way of Tonio Liuzzi. Or Peter Sauber. Still, close racing, epic scraps... actually, we had all that even with Seb running off with the win yet again. Ah well. Let's just pretend eh? Will Alonso win the championship now? It's wide open.... *sigh* Scores on the doors time! Golly, I'm doing well ;-( Anyway, here's the running totals... Now, that's interesting isn't it...? (Results number-crunched with a stubby pencil to the tune of Queen 3" CD singles - currently "Tie Your Mother Down". Sound advice.)