grumpyf1

Just a handful of days left until Christmas – the tree is up, presents are wrapped, and the eggs have been nogged. That means it’s time to revel in one of the season’s greatest joys... When I say “Presents are wrapped”, I’m obviously excluding any virtual vouchers, which are currently wafting through cyberspace and probably disrupting Santa’s sat-nav, so don’t blame me if you’re a 48 year old, burly, man who gets One Direction’s latest album and a Barbie Doll on the 25th. Whilst the remaining turkeys on the farm are just starting to realise that their friends haven’t gone “on holiday”, we are now firmly into the timeframe reserved for one of the most indulgent moments of the festive season – going through the bumper Christmas & New Year TV guide to plan what we’re going to watch. It is a vitally important exercise, and not one to be undertaken in a rush. Without this military planning, how will you know what to watch whilst seeing off your own body weight in mince pies, cho

You might remember that I’m attempting to learn something (other than where the best cat videos are on YouTube, obviously) and took up studying in the summer. If going back to education after a 30 year gap is like riding a bike again, then I’ve fallen off, scraped my knees and had several punctures whilst wobbling around violently. The last six months have seen me careering without brakes towards an exam, which seemed fairly scary until last Wednesday, when I travelled to Manchester to take it, and it became really hideously scary. Apparently, exams aren’t nearly frightening enough on their own nowadays, and some initiative tests have been introduced to ensure maximum stress levels before you pick up your pen. On arrival, the main entrance had a notice on it, saying that exam victims needed to use an entrance on another street. After eventually locating that, it was time to find the hall on floor K. After a few long seconds of blinking rapidly at an array of buttons, it turne

Christmas – a fleeting, wonderful, time of year.  Jam – fruity deliciousness for your toast. Neither should be spread thinly. So why does the festive season start so early now? Black Friday may have turned out to be notable mainly for the absence of commotion in physical shopping emporiums, but it did have one worrying development that you may not have been aware of, and the Evening Mail seems to have missed – our new, young, neighbours got a Christmas tree, decorated it, and have clearly forgotten where the off switch for the lights is ever since. At the risk of being accused, again, of getting my Scrooge flag out and waving it vigorously (and possibly a bit aggressively) from the rooftops, that’s a whole sleigh-load too early, with nigh-on a month to go until the jolly chap in red is due to show up with presents (and I don’t mean the postie with your Amazon delivery), and Grandma gets a bit squiffy on the cooking sherry. Unless you happen to be a shop (in which case your st

You're right - I'm a bad person. Just vanishing like that for weeks on end. And with this blog celebrating it's 6th anniversary, too. And with Christmas just around the corner. And after November was my 2nd best month ever for views, with more than 2100 of you taking the time to visit. Sorry. I've got three newspaper columns to post, and I'll do that over the next couple of days. Fairly weak excuses include; studying, writing Christmas cards, buying last minute Christmas presents, going out and drinking cappuccinos, having to work for a living, and being a lazy sod. Must try harder... (Attempting to mask the guild with a Def Leppard CD - Hysteria, to be precise.)